May 2013
Darkest Before Dawn. [Teddy & Henry]
henry-b:
I get the double stroller out of the trunk and fold it out, getting it ready for the twins who have been eager for some fresh air, I’m convinced. I smirk as I retreive Lillian from her car seat, excitedly kicking her little feet. “You’re so ready to get out in the sun, aren’t you sweetheart?” She is probably hoping to be let loose on the soft grass. I steal a glance at Teddy who is...
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
Sometimes communication is the key to everything. Since that’s coming from someone who didn’t communicate well in the past and knows the aftereffects, you should believe me. And I’m not going anywhere, Teddy.
I know, and I am getting better at it. I don’t see two different therapists every week for nothing. Maybe we could get those waffles sometime soon? I could use...
1 tag
Actions make more of a mess than words can make.
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
Wow. I’ve been such a crap friend, I doesn’t even know about those issues. I’m deeply sorry, I really am.
But you always know where to find me, and I always have time for you.
You’ve had a lot on your plate. Besides, I haven’t exactly been willing to talk about it. Hell, I just started telling people that I am pregnant. It’s good to know that you’re still...
henry-b asked: [text] I can wait until you get off.
henry-b asked: [text] Yeah, I think it'd be nice.
henry-b asked: [text] You could come if you wanted to.
henry-b asked: [text] It's been fine. Look, I thought I'd pick up the twins early and take them to the park.
henry-b asked: [text] Good. How has your day been?
henry-b asked: [text] Alright, I suppose. How's Isaiah?
henry-b asked: [text] Hey... How are you?
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
I’m so not the only one deserving that. You do just as much as I do.
And that’s good. Because you are having kids together, and you love him just as much. Right?
Right. We’re working through some issues at the moment, but that doesn’t change how I feel about him. I love him. It’s just hard.
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
Because you are! I want to shout out at the top of my lungs. She is sick, try denying that.
“Because I don’t know what to do, Teddy. And I know how disappointing that is, but that’s the truth. I don’t know what to say or what to do because whatever I say it always seem to rub you the wrong way. If I am optimistic, then I am fooling no one, if I am logical, I have no faith in...
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
Ah, being stressed out all the time and having no time to actually eat makes you pretty fancy. If I get to eat, I want to eat something great. Well, that is because he loves you, Teddy.
Well then, we will eat some fancy waffles with vanilla ice cream on top because you deserve it.
I know he does…
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I am so saddened that she does not think I have faith in her. Nothing could be further from the truth. I don’t see how I can change that. I just don’t know anymore.
“I am not supportive? Really?” I have done nothing but try to show support; from the moment she told me she was pregnant I have wanted to accommodate her in every way. I let her know that her feelings were important to me,...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“I believe in you,” I say, resting my forehead against hers. There is no one I believe in more than my wife, but that does not mean that I can just stop hating myself for everything I have been and am putting her through, especially since it broke her. It broke her into a million little pieces and assembling those are taking so long. I do not know what to do or say, I can’t just turn it...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“And you did? No, Teddy, you don’t get to either.” If I cannot blame myself, neither can she. But she cannot deny that underneath all of her current happiness, the depression is still eating at her. And it seems that every time we talk about Isaiah’s condition, she gets sad, understandably. I am afraid that she will think of it every time she looks at him, I am scared that once he is...
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
theodora-altman:
That actually sounds amazing. I might have to skip the coffee since I told April I would meet her for coffee sometime today. Henry might not be on me about my caffeine intake this time around, but I know it makes him anxious.
Well, then no coffee for you. Still, waffles and some vanilla ice cream are all that matters - it’s stuff dreams are made of. And your...
Do I want to eat that cupcake? Or do I want to eat...
zona-robbins:
..Help.
Always eat the cupcake.
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“I did look at you!” I defend myself. I looked up and I looked at her, taking in all the pain and heartbreak. I step forward and cup her face, gazing into those beautiful eyes. “I just hate to see you like this. I know I did this. I’m sorry.” I am so sorry and I am not sure I will ever stop being sorry because what I have done will not pass, it will not get better in time. Our son has...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
At this point, I do not know what to do.
“Your parents are going to love Isaiah just as much as they love Lillian and Miles, just as much as we do.” They are not going to hate us for giving them a grandchild with a fatal disease, what kind of people do that? Not Teddy’s parents. They love us and they are going to understand that this is harder for us than it is for them.
“Why are...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
If only I could turn back time… Eventually, we would have to have this conversation, there was no preventing that, but having it here in the midst of all these people was a bad idea. I get up and toss our food in the trash before stepping outside into the hallway. I consider leaving for a split second, but that would only make things worse. She needs me to stay, at least until she tells...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I look at her because I owe her that much, but what I can hardly stand it. I thought we had finally moved on, both accepting the pregnancy, but while both of us have that has not changed the gravity of the situation and has not made it any less horrible. I was naive to think it would, I realize that. “Teddy,” I whisper. She does not understand, and how could she? She does not get that...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I feel like my entire world is collapsing around me once again, and it does not seem that long since it did it the last time. It’s going to break their heart. I do not know why that hits as hard as it does, of course it will. “I still think they will be happy,” I mumble, stuffing my mouth with food. This was not what I was expecting when coming her today.
“I want to tell them,” I say....
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I am taken aback by her reply, I never meant for it to be loaded with anything. He is infected with my exhausting disease, though, that is a fact. I do not get a chance to say anything before she moves on, and if I was surprised before it is nothing compared to what I feel now. Talk about the hormone roller coaster.
“Hey, that is not what I meant,” I say, catching her eye. “You are...
zona-robbins asked: [Text] Well, /that/ is certainly a really great idea. And we could have a long-needed girl nig-.. afternoon.
God, I am starving ALL the time.
zona-robbins:
Coffee and waffles?
That actually sounds amazing. I might have to skip the coffee since I told April I would meet her for coffee sometime today. Henry might not be on me about my caffeine intake this time around, but I know it makes him anxious.
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“They do, and I am sure they wouldn’t miss out on an opportunity like that.” I look at her, wondering if I should ask her not to tell them about the VHL. They are bound to find out a some point, and I do not like keeping things from them. They still have no idea about the fake marriage, and while that have worked out because it is more or less irrelevant, I do not think this would.
...
zona-robbins asked: [Text] Nopes, Sof has been spending a day at Mark's and then a day with Callie. Plus she insists of meeting them outside of the hospital. I'm rather fine right now, actually. Which is good. How's Henry doing?
akepnermdsgmw asked: (Text): Anytime after 10, I start work at noon!
akepnermdsgmw asked: (Text): Care to do coffee sometime today? The puppies kept two sleepy doctors up all night. Least Pretty Boy got some sleep once I got home from work.
God, I am starving ALL the time.
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“Yeah, sounds good.” Stir-fry is easy, makes time for eating and talking and whatnot. I am happy that we can spend time together again without it being tense and awkward. You never want to feel either around your wife.
“It is about time, I think,” I agree. I am sure Teddy’s parents will be thrilled at the prospect of another grandson, and I really hope that they are up for flying out...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I can understand that, I suppose. The hormonal casserole of a pregnant lady is not one to kid with, and Teddy can be outright mean. The hormones do that, makes her rage like a river. The thing about her is that she gets such a bad conscious about it, whenever I have experienced it at least, and apologizes.
“Ha, no, I don’t think I’m her type,” I smile. I wish I knew what Lauren’s type...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“But why do they stare? They should all be happy for you.” This place sometimes, I swear, it is not healthy to be here. The elevator comes to a halt and we step out, heading towards the cafeteria. Lunch sounds good right about now, my stomach was starting growl.
“Oh, yeah, I told Lauren. Think she’s jealous,” I wink, “Can’t blame her though.” I love my family, it is the single most...
zona-robbins asked: [Text] Hey, Teddy. How are you doing today? How are the twins doing? Sofia misses them quite badly.
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
“Good, I’m glad.” There is something about being in an elevator with her that makes me appreciate her so much more, undoubtedly because that is where it all started; in an elevator. Funny, how coincidence can become life changing.
“It’s been fine. Things are nice and steady at the office.” Granted, it becomes uniform at times but with things being as hectic as they have been lately,...
Attachment Barbie: I Could Eat You Up, I Love You... →
henry-b:
I smile as Teddy rounds the corner and even more so as she greets me hello. We have been trying hard to keep our problems separate from her work, but I think the greeting is genuine this time not forced.
“Oh, like you never pop in on them,” I smirk. Actually, that was kind of the whole idea of having them in daycare here, so she could be close to them while working. Well, that and it...
I Could Eat You Up, I Love You So. [Teddy & Henry]
henry-b:
Visiting the kids in daycare is always interesting. Most days they are both happy to see me, but leaving is hardly ever a problem. They like daycare. Today, though, Lillian could not be bothered by my presence busy making new friends or something. My boy was ever so happy to see his da-da, so that makes up for it. Sort of. I must admit to feeling slightly rejected, and I am sure that I...
henry-b asked: [text] Go get some rest, honey.
henry-b asked: [text] You didn't know that the hospital walls have ears? ;) I'm fine, how about you?
henry-b asked: [text] Nothing wrong with being pregnant for sure.
henry-b asked: [text] Hey babe, did you forget your scrubs today? I put them out for you, but they're still here.
1 tag
I think I might just wear regular scrubs tomorrow and see what people say. Only a handful of people at work actually know I’m pregnant. This should be interesting…
